8.25.2009

Forgiveness and Forgetting

So I have been thinking about this topic a great deal the past year or so, and thought I would formulate it into a blog post. Now once again this is not directed at any particular person in my life, it mostly about others, but I am only eligible to write this post because I have suffered through years of trying to pardon those that have done me wrong, and the harder part of forgetting. Now to bring this topic to order let me state my thought and give some example. Then let’s try to wrap it up with some good quotes and personal experience.

How do you honestly forgive someone? How do you take something for what it is worth and move on? Here is my point, how many of us have truly forgiven people of there trespasses? I myself believe that most of us paint a resolution in just going through the motions of saying I’m sorry or I forgive you. In my own life, I can tell you that I have had some people do some things that would need some forgiving. My problem is that I try to brush it off as not a big deal, and voice it to the person that I am over it or have moved on with no hard feelings. In that way the person responsible feels forgiven and can now move on in there own steps of repentance. But, with in me it still turns and boils, not truly forgiving, but no one knows it but me. Well one day those feelings boil over and hurt that person even more. Why hold onto the pain and feelings of hate and disgust?

For me I had to put myself in the picture and evaluate my life, am I truly happy with the choice of not forgiving. Once you put that in the picture, the outcome is vastly different. You find that you are not as “good” as you thought you were. Once you see the improvements you need in your own life, it clears way for forgiving. True happiness comes from letting go of the past no matter what and looking forward till tomorrow, cherishing every moment as if you had no tomorrow. You can’t do that unless you let go of all the anger and grudges and bitterness that hold you back from being happy.

We are taught to forgive all, so that is what we should do no matter how hard it is. Just let it go and move on. I know from personal application that if you just forgive, forget and move on like nothing happened, you will be happier than you were before.

“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” – Gandhi

“Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.” – Paul Boese

So be the strong person, be the first to forgive, but honestly forgive don’t expect someone else to do it first, do it yourself, for you! You can’t change the past, you can only take the experiences and turn them into life lessons and build from them. Making you more prepared for future experiences.

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